Madelaine Benefield is upset about the colour of the adornment on the cake she bought for her friend Louisa.

But Friends Get A Rise From Explicit Confection

OAKLAND, CA--Madelaine Benefield wanted to do something interesting for her best friend Louisa's 35th birthday. She thought that one of those erotic cakes would be just the thing to get a rise out of her girlfriend, who had been a little depressed about turning thirty-five.

So Madelaine decided to order an adult-themed cake from Bob's Erotic Cakes, and had them decorate it with male genitalia. But when Madelaine picked up the cake, her disappointment at the cake's confection cock was obvious--the cake and its adornment were vanilla, and not chocolate like she expected!

"I got shafted," said Madelaine to another friend, Cornicia Deburke. "I should've said 'f*ck this cake,' and then gone to Kinky Kakes or Masturbakers; they would've satisfied me."

It was her own fault really. Madelaine hadn't specified the type of icing for the phallically-enhanced cake. She complained to the owner, Bob (a stand-up guy), about the pastry penis, but Bob was being somewhat pissy and defensive, saying there was nothing wrong with the cake as it was, and that any lady would be proud to get their fingers on it.

By that time it was too late for Madelaine to order another--if only she had come sooner. The only other cake in the store was a triple-layered wedding cake with nude bride and groom figures. There were a few tarts in the store, but they were waiting to place their own order.

Although hesitant to present Louisa with a birthday cake with white "frosting," Madelaine decided it was better than leaving it lying around the house, where it would certainly lose its sponginess.

"And what if my husband saw it?" she said. "How would I explain that...Dick? Dick is my husband's name, of course."

Madelaine showed the shapely-shafted cake to Cornicia, but Cornicia didn't think the raunchy angel-food treat looked bad at all. In fact, she thought it was a good-sized cake, and that it stood out in all the right places.

"It's not the icing that counts," she reassured Madelaine. "It's how well it covers the cake."

"I can see myself going down on that cake," added Cornicia, "I could probably swallow the whole thing."