Biting Satire

But The Sign Says: ON DRUGS The great thing about lighted store signs is that they project the store's message loud and bright and clear. But sometimes, the same glowing letters can let you down, leaving you with a cryptic message that confuses and dismays consumers. Where the original lit store ...

I'm Drinking This Pineapple Juice For You, Baby I must admit, that when it comes to my partner in life, I'm willing to do almost anything it takes to please her--no matter how uncomfortable the actions might make me feel or whatever embarrassment it may cause. Her happiness is important to ...

Is The Thing Always Rock Hard? Like many kids of my generation, I grew up reading Marvel comics, and the adventures of Spiderman, Captain America, and the X-Men. But for me, The Fantastic Four was the most popular superhero comic book series of all. And although they''ve been around for over ...

Three Boobs Are Better Than Two Aren't They? Ever since the release of the movie Total Recall in 1990, I have fantasized about women with three breasts. You see, in this off-world Arnold Schwarzenegger action movie, there was this beautiful Martian mutant (I forget her name) who worked as a topless ...

The Real Dirt On The "Wash Me" Phenomenon It's been a couple of weeks since you last had the thick grime removed from your Honda, and because of the miserable road conditions lately, even more layers of salt and dirt have accumulated on the outside of your economy vehicle. You know your ...

How Everyone Thumbed Their Noses At The Hand The Hamburger Helper Helping Hand, the friendly little General Mills mascot who entertained television audiences for years with his cute brand of commercial appeal, has fallen on hard times. The pasty white creature is up to his knuckles in debt and there are rumors ...

If You Want Me To Be A Sperm Donor, I'm Going To Need A Bigger Cup I appreciate this opportunity to be able to donate my most worthy seed to such a humane cause. Infertility, although I have never experienced it first hand, is as I hear, a very serious problem ...

The Porn Industry Has Some Growing Up To Do HOLLYWOOD-- It's sad when you watch a low-budget adult pornographic movie and you recognize one of the characters--a former exploited minor. "Hey, I used to see that kid act in pre-teen fuck films. I wonder what he''s doing now?" Child porn stars ...

Fluffers Maintain A Firm Hold In Adult Film Industry ON THE FILM SET-- They say that the job a person does tells a lot about the person. Well, I'm a fluffer in the adult film industry. So what does that say about me? I'm a good person, I'm well compensated, ...

Censored Boobies Cause A Rise In Anger Levels It happens like this: you're home on the couch watching a re-run of MacGyver at 1:35am when on comes an extended commercial for some “chicks gone crazy” DVD. You watch a short clip of a tipsy young blonde dancing and smiling and flirting with ...